BY STEVE BATES
It’s time for another installment of “Because You Asked”, in which I answer your tough questions. I must add a caveat, however. No, a caveat is not a form of men’s neckware. It’s a … never mind. (I should just ignore my lawyer when he tells me that I need to tell readers DO NOT ATTEMPT any advice I offer.)
Keep those crucial questions coming. Here we go….
Yes, but only between consenting adults, and only in places like Amsterdam and at small colleges in the American South. And please lock the door and put on some loud music to block the awful noise.
No, leave the jack up before taking the wheel off the rim. I said—no, leave the jack up! Noooo!!!
Yes, Emperor Palpatine was a nasty guy. But remember, before he became emperor and made it clear that he favored the Dark Side, he was a Senator. His original name was Mitch McConnell.
It’s baking powder, not baking soda. And no, it’s not explosive. I think.
I do not recommend going to the Emergency Room because of the danger of your condition spreading. Instead, text me with your exact address, barricade yourself in the basement, and I’ll contact military authorities, who will drop and extreme amount of explosives there and cordon off a five-mile perimeter around the crater.
Before I answer your question, let me ask you one: Does it really matter if the light is on inside your refrigerator after you close the door? I mean how much electricity does it take? You waste at least that much growing those plants in the closet that you keep locked.
No, Bryce Harper has not had hair implants. They have tried giving him personality implants, but they didn’t take.
Ha! About the same time that we get safe self-driving cars. Which will be long after Hell freezes over.
No, that dress does not make you look fat.
You’re supposed to sniff the glue, not drink it. There’s the danger that your mouth will get closed up permanently. Say, maybe that isn’t such a bad idea.
It was banned in California by Mission priests, but only until 1834, because some waltzers had the audacity to touch in public.
No, it doesn’t happen to all men, and it really is a big problem.